Category Archives: Self Help
Depression . . .
Let me update you on my emotional life . . .
If you read back to my post (around late 2008 onward), you can see I really fought a battle. Thankfully, I had enough insight to see my Doc about it, and though some talking and different meds, I found one that helped me. I take cymbalta, the pretty green and blue pill. It has helped. I can tell when I don’t take it for sure. I would have to say that I’m not depressed, but like those in AA who have been sober for years – still call themselves alcoholics. I would still say I have depression. It’s kinda silly, but that’s how I see it. I feel happy in my life (except the annoying battles with the ex), and try to be positive about things.
I can tell when I don’t take it. I tend to get in the mood to sit in the dark and do nothing but sleep all day. So with the help of my husband, and a little Sunday through Saturday pill-box, I mostly remember to take it!
It helps to have others who know what depression is, knowing how that feeling of hopelessness and not wanting to do anything just lingers. It’s great to talk about it, and know you aren’t alone (wow, I sound like a commercial).
So if you feel like you are depressed, please seek help. See a therapist, find a friend, see your doctor. I know most people don’t want to “be on drugs” . . . but believe me, there are more on them that you know. LOL, and many who NEED it! 
But remember always, to love yourself . . . no matter what.
R.I.P.
To my favorite purse, the big red gaudy one, I will miss you. To my lovely lavender coach wallet, I will truly miss you. Sigh.
No, I did not lose my stuff. Sadly, my car was mugged. In my driveway. Yes, the same driveway/carport the lawnmower and stuff was in. DAMN IT! It’s so aggravating to have to call all these stupid places and cancel stuff and what not.
Tuesday night I came home from the lake, park, and Wal*Mart and left my purse in my car, the trunk to be exact. At 8pm, my Mother In Law brought the kids home, one of them unlocked my car and got something out of it, and we went on with our night. Wednesday night around 5pm we get in the car to go swimming at Heather’s, and the glove compartment, and middle consoles are dumped out (and as an after thought I also closed the trunk when we went out there). I got on the kids for getting into my stuff and off we went. When we got home that night, I went to pull out my purse (I have a day-planner thing that I’ve kept times/dates of things with the Ex and kids) and of course it was gone. GRRR. Don said that when he came to my house that afternoon (around lunch time) all that stuff was dumped out in my car. Oddly, the purse thief did not want my large collection of subway straws in my glove compartment.
The Sheriff’s office came out today, nothing to do about it! I had a $100 in cash, all my normal wallet stuff, and that day-planner. oh, and my favorite lip-glosses!
GRRRRRR
I have an addiction
well, many in fact. But shoes! Ack! I’ll admit that I made the pic down below the screen saver for my computer. I need therapy!!!
1, 2, 1, 2, 3, 4 (love this song!)
1, 2, 1, 2, 3, 4
Give me more lovin’ than I’ve ever had
Make it all better when I’m feelin’ sad
Tell me that I’m special even when I know I’m not
Make me feel good when I hurt so bad
Barely gettin’ mad, I’m so glad I found you
I love bein’ around you
You make it easy, it’s as easy as 1, 2, 1, 2, 3, 4
There’s only one thing to do
Three words for you I love you
There’s only one way to say
Those three words and that’s what I’ll do, I love you
Give me more lovin’ from the very start
Piece me back together when I fall apart
Tell me things you never even tell your closest friends
Make me feel good when I hurt so bad
Best that I’ve had, I’m so glad that I found you
I love bein’ around you
You make it easy, it’s as easy as 1, 2, 1, 2, 3, 4
There’s only one thing to do
Three words for you I love you
There’s only one way to say
Those three words and that’s what I’ll do, I love you
I love you
You make it easy, it’s easy as 1, 2, 1, 2, 3, 4
There’s only one thing to do
Three words for you I love you
There’s only one way to say
Those three words and that’s what I’ll do, I love you
I love you
1, 2, 3, 4
I love you
I love you
Nights
I hate nights.
I hate being alone.
I hate not having someone to hold me, or be next to me so I reach out and touch him.
I hate the empty feeling I have at night.
I hate waking up alone, having no one to kiss me good morning, tell me they love seeing me when they open their eyes first thing, or having someone to tell me to have a good day.
I have no one to give me these affirmations that I’m wanted as a person.
I know my children love me, but they don’t have these feelings, they are unknown to them.
I hope they never have to feel this way.
Thank you
Over the last few months I’ve learned that I have some great friends. I may not talk to all of them all the time, but they are there when I need them. Thank you to those of you who called me yesteday to check on me, and those who called or text, and I didn’t respond, I’m sorry, but know that you are very appreciated!
I’m doing better today, only a few tears shed. And I got out of bed
I’m giving it time and space. We will see what happens.
Me and Other Randomness
Wow, what a whirlwind the last few weeks have been!
If you remember back on my Mother’s Day post, I had met Darren that week before. Well since then we’ve seen each other bunches! He is very sweet and very good to me and the boys. And that’s all I will say about that (for now lol).
I took vacation from work the last week or so of May, because you know working two days a week is very trying!!! My birthday is May 24th, have I mentioned I love my birthday??!?!?! It’s just a good day for me. My wonderful best friend HEATHER took me for a facial (ahhhhh) at Bladez (where we both get our hair done by Annette). It was sooo wonderful! Then we went for pedicures (oh so much needed) and lunch at Olive Garden! She is sooo good to me! I love you Heather! I wish we had gotten pics of us during our spa time!
I went to Darren’s house where he had the most beautiful pink roses! I haven’t gotten flowers in years, so they were very well appreciated! We all went to dinner, Heather, Don, Darren, Me, Freda and Steve (Heathers Mom), and Mandie and her husband at Salsas, where I got my favorite giant margarita. YUM! It was fun and relaxing. Afterwards we went to Smyleys for a few drinks and dancing. FUN! Y’all know how much Heather and I love to dance! Don and I even had a good two step going! I must be getting old because we called it a night around 1230 am!!!
It was really a great birthday!!!
My water heater broke 
ugh. Thanks to help from a friend I was able to get a new one sooner than I had hoped for! You know how I love my hot showers! lol, and clean dishes!
I have turned in my application and everything needed for acceptance into UCA MSN program. Now I sit and wait to see what my next step is. I’m sure I have a history class to take, which is no biggie.
I approved my divorce papers this morning, and Mike is suppose to go look at them today too. So maybe by next week it’ll all be done and over with.
I feel like I’m in a good place. I’ve lost a few friends over the last few weeks for reason really unknown to me, and I’ve tried to reach out to them to work things out, but they apparently they have no desire to. I have so much going on in my life that I really don’t have time to sit and dwell on negative things anymore. I’m on my way to being fully happy again, and I can’t wait.
Life Is Good.
